Dear YKWYA;
Thank you for deliberately and maliciously reversing years of progress.
At one time I was ever so grateful to you for helping me get to where I would accept adult human affection after what had been done to me. I was so glad for that.
Then on Oct 22 or 23, (due to the trauma of the event I just can't recall the exact date), you decide to overreact, more than I did, (i will address that in a moment), and now I am again afraid of adult human touch and interaction.
What you perceived as an attack was nothing more than a few light taps to get your attention, which I have to do a lot with you. Maybe the meds you are on are making your skin extra sensitive. I do not know. But LMN overreaction much? You acted like I had shot, stabbed, or was always hitting you. All of which are fallacies.
I have to tell you this way as you refuse to acknowledge any research I do if I talk to you. You would rather fight. So here goes. As you know I have C/PTSD. You know the stuff so I won't waste our time. Anyway, SSL, people have always been allowed to take my stuff. My brain went thru 3 stages that night, the first flashback to my stuff being taken away for fun, phase 2 panic and paranoia that it was happening again, and 3 (which I hate BTW) anger violence attack because I/it am/are tired of that shit (people taking my stuff).
This realization does not make it any more right from MY SIDE but makes your side absolutely bizarre and ridiculously acted out. Like I said, maybe you were having troubles that night too and perfect storm collision. I dunno.
I want anxiety meds that I can take when these things happen (I wish I had some weed). I would have taken one when I felt anxiety that night. I do not appreciate when my brain trips balls. I truly just wanted to ask a simple calm question and my idiot brain flipped biscuits. But then, so did yours, only a helluva lot worse.
We need to communicate. PURE AND SIMPLE. Divorce is not the answer, communication is. I want it, I do not believe you do.
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